10 ideas for better foreplay
Unless launching into some quickie sex, foreplay shouldn’t be something that’s rushed. It should get you both in the mood, heightening anticipation as you build towards the main event. If you’re bored with your pre-coital experience because you keep going through the same motions over and over again (kiss, strip, oral, sex, repeat), then it’s time to rethink what you’re doing in the warm up and discover how to have better foreplay by adding more to your repertoire.
Foreplay should be fun and exciting. It should have your body buzzing and lusting for more. Next time you’re building up to the hot and heavy, give your foreplay session a boost by experimenting with these sexy ideas. And you never know, you may even find that these are enough to leave you satisfied so sex isn’t even required!
So kiss me
A long, deep, slow sexy kiss is the perfect starting place for foreplay. It lets your partner know exactly what type of mood you’re in without a single word passing between you. Vary the pressure of each kiss from light, barely there lip caresses to gentle nibbling and fuller, open mouthed snogging (although if you reach the tonsils you may have gone too far!)
Keep eye-contact as each kiss breaks and you move onto gently nuzzling other erogenous zones like the earlobes, neck, shoulders and inner thighs. For an extra thrill try adding a buzzing, tingling, erogenous zone friendly lip balm like the System JO Kiss Buzz before kissing them.
Warm to the touch
Spending time touching is an important aspect of foreplay, because it helps to create a greater connection and physical bond. No one likes cold hands though, so ensure your every touch is a warm one by dabbing a warming lubricant like the Sliquid Organics Sensations onto your finger tips. Trail them over your lover’s skin and gently blow on the areas you’ve touched so it warms even more. Not only will they get to enjoy being caressed, but the warming effect is perfect for adding a little extra surprise during your foreplay touches. Go a step further and turn touching into a whole foreplay experience by delivering an erotic massage.
Out of sight
A recent study confirmed that by shutting out visual input (basically closing the eyes), the body then uses more mental resources to focus on other sensations and aspects of a pleasurable experience.
Make this part of your foreplay by asking your partner to close their eyes, or if they can’t be trusted, place a blindfold over their peepers. Ask them to focus on their other senses and then stimulate each and every one in turn. A favourite food for taste, whispering sexy thoughts for hearing, or touching different areas of their body that don’t usually get much attention during sex. Ask them to tell them how it makes them feel as you test each sense.
Keep playing games
If you’ve had a long week finding the inspiration and energy to try something new might put you off intimacy all together. That’s when dice or card games come into their own. Will the roll of a die, or the pick of a card you could be trying something completely different to try and exciting in the bedroom. Play as many times as you want. Hopefully after a few rounds your libido will be on the up and you’ll both be in the mood for more.
There’s no reason why foreplay should start or only happen in the bedroom. Sow the seeds of sexy fun long before reaching your four-poster by sending a sext detailing what you want your partner to do to you once you’re together. Or, if you’re feeling really adventurous, use a wireless remote control sex toy and hand the controller over to your lover. Something like the Ultra 7 Remote Egg or Magic Motion Vibrating Egg that can be controlled using a wireless remote or your smartphone is perfect. The anticipation of letting your lover choose when you get to experience a burst of vibration will keep you on your toes and create a very sexy tension between you.
Create a big sensation
Rather than only touching your lover with your hands, using extra tools like a feather tickler, soft flogger or spanking paddle can enliven all of the sensitive nerve endings in the skin. Gently trailing, tickling or flicking these items over their body means they’ll become more sensitive to any touch you bestow on them afterwards.
Sweet like chocolate
Chocolate and sex are a match made in heaven. Both are sweet, enjoyable and can cause our brains to release the feel-good hormone, dopamine. No wonder using body chocolate is such a popular foreplay choice for many couples and, thankfully, the days of over-sweet, super sticky body chocolate are gone. Rich, smooth body paints like Shunga, or cholate flavoured lubricant such as System JO Chocolate Delight are perfect for licking off your partner’s naked body, allowing you to really slow down the action. Alternatively, if you don’t like the idea of getting completely wet and messy, you could just apply it to your lips for extra sweet kisses, or dab small amounts on your body as a guide to let your partner know where you want them to focus their attention.
A little extra touch
Who says vibrators need to be limited to women and only used on the clitoris? Get hold of a smaller bullet vibrator with a rounded tip and there’s no reason why this little buzzing beauty can’t be used all over the body. Don’t go straight for the obvious erogenous zones like the clitoris or his perineum. Instead opt for thinner areas of skin that are still full of sensitive nerves, such as the backs of knees, the fold of the arm or around the nipple area. Take your time working up to the more sensitive erogenous zones and before long your partner will be begging for more.
Bondage tape is inexpensive and can be used in a number of sexy ways during foreplay. Create clothing out of it and then, using a pair of blunt-edged scissors, get your partner to cut you out of your clothes rather than stripping. Alternatively, if they enjoy being tied up, restrain your lover’s hands or feet so you can take your time kissing, licking and touching their body without being interrupted.
Dress to impress
There’s a saying that you should ‘wear sexy underwear, even if you’re the only one that’s going to see it’ and we totally love this idea because who says your foreplay has to involve anyone else? Slip into a pair of sexy undies or knickers at the start of the day and let the feeling of your erotic little secret build until you get home. You can even perform a sexy striptease in front of the mirror, enjoying and admiring how good you look before satisfying yourself with your favourite sex toy.
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